Flowers and punctuality do not always pay off in France

Connexion reader Maggie F (surname withheld) has shared an embarrassing tale from when she and her husband Jim first moved to Limousin in 2010.

“We made every effort to integrate,” she said. “We joined French classes, practised our conversation in the bar-tabac and took a small gift to each neighbour to introduce ourselves.”

Their hard work paid off when their closest neighbours, Marie-Jeanne and Bernard, invited the couple for apéritifs on a Saturday at 19:00.

“Jim and I usually have our dinner around that time, but we thought if we went for one quick drink, we could be back within the hour and wouldn’t eat too late.

“That was our first mistake, because we arrived at exactly 19:00 and Bernard answered with a look of surprise, saying that Marie-Jeanne would be with us in a moment.

“We have since learned that in France you’re expected to arrive a little later than the given time, usually 15 minutes, so we had apparently caught her still getting ready.”

Their second mistake involved a gift of flowers.

“The invitation was two days before Toussaint (All Saints’ Day),” said Maggie, “and the florists were filled with chrysanthemums. 

"However, we hadn’t realised that in France people buy them to place on the graves of their loved ones. I can still picture Marie-Jeanne’s face when we handed her our chrysanthemums, and I was utterly mortified when they later explained why she’d looked so stunned.”

Fortunately, the faux pas did not halt their burgeoning friendship: “We often laugh together about that first visit when we turned up too early with a bunch of funeral flowers.”

Have you made a similar faux pas? Share your story at feedback@connexionfrance.com