Learning French: when and why do we say qui se ressemble s’assemble?

France hosts a variety of festivals and events linked to specific pastimes or interests. These celebrations are often an opportunity for like-minded individuals to gather together.

This observation may lead you to use the phrase: qui se ressemble s’assemble.

We look at how exactly to use this fun saying to highlight similarities, so you sound just like a native French speaker.

What does qui se ressemble s’assemble mean?

It literally translates as: those who resemble each other get together.

In English, this would be translated as ‘birds of a feather flock together’, and it is interesting that the phrase also contains a rhyme in French, even though the language used in the expressions differs significantly.

Read also: Learning French: tout est bon dans le cochon and other pig expressions

This expression describes the way in which people with similar characteristics, hobbies, habits or backgrounds appear to gravitate towards each other and are more likely to be friends, or even lovers.

The phrase could also be translated as ‘like attracts like’ or ‘a match made in heaven.’ 

A French slang version of this saying is vrai reconnaisse vrai, but it is only used in informal settings - usually by younger generations - an never in a romantic context. 

Of course, even though birds of a feather flock together, opposites also attract (les opposés s’attirent).

Another French proverb relating to similarities and differences within relationships is: il n’y a aucune mauvaise chaussure qui ne trouve sa pareille (there is no bad shoe without its matching pair).

This means that no matter how average or flawed a person may be, there is always someone out there for them. It has since fallen out of use.

When do you say qui se ressemble s’assemble?

It is usually used as a standalone phrase in reaction to a statement.

For example, someone might express surprise that two people are friends or have become romantically involved, and another may reply simply: Qui se ressemble s’assemble!

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You can also say this when you notice common traits between two friends:

• Oh mais vous aimez tous les deux les films de Disney ? Qui se ressemble s’assemble ! - Oh so you both love disney films? birds of a feather flock together!

It is not always used in a positive sense, however, and can be said as a way of highlighting someone’s flaws:

• J'ai rencontré la petite amie de mon frère et elle est aussi méchante que lui. Qui se ressemble s’assemble, comme on dit. - I met my brother’s girlfriend and she is just as mean as he is. You know what they say: like attracts like.

To whom do you say qui se ressemble s’assemble?

It is neutral, colloquial language that is most often used with friends and family, however it can also be said in more formal or professional situations.

Read also: Learning French: when and why do we say rendre la monnaie de sa pièce?

If used to indicate a positive similarity between two or more people, it should not cause any offense. Some people may get upset if the phrase is used to highlight their negative traits.

If you would like us to explain a particular word or expression, or if you have any other Learning French suggestions, let us know at: feedback@connexionfrance.com